No, you’re not a party pooper. You are just drained.
Don’t be fooled. Software developers have an extremely demanding job, often without praise, only finger-pointed at when bugs are found. And even the more collaborative development environments are still very work/problem-centric.
While problem solving brings great enjoyment, personal internal “problems”, which are not analytical by nature, become extremely frustrating and can have a devastating impact in the software developer’s mental and emotional well-being that won’t just go away with back-patting and cheering from well-meaning peers and colleagues. Yes, close connections absolutely helps, but doesn’t always lead to the comfort needed.
A trained mental health care professional or emotional therapist who you can trust is the best bet. If you are interested in a support group, there are options which do not need to be tied to your profession or your peers in any way. The support provided by those who share similar struggles transcends professional alignment. Also check out online sources like Techcrunch’s article on ‘5 Ways to Improve Mental Health for Software Developers‘, and those on social media platforms and other mental health forums where people with similar challenges converge. It’s an awesome step just to reach out like this. Be proud of that.
Holidays or not, what actions are you taking towards making sure that your software development team’s mental and emotional health remains optimal?